‘’………..consuming precious
energy to
explore the unkown up to unreliable dreams’’ (scraps from diary pages, 2010,
Wakefield, Yorkshire, GB)
The
butcher will strike again, she was mad of this obsession roaming into her head,
like an old chorus that we all knew from the start.It difers from one
individual to another, speed some fear and your heart may pump from your chest,
already.This endless battle within yourself shall never find an escape, like a foolish game about losers and winners,
an open debate too.It feels like an unruly anger possess your spirit, though
all you have to do is move on.
*
Is it
true, isn’t it?!As if people would know something about truth, it’s too much
hypocrisy in the world, though truth shall never be found.Definetly, it’s true.D.
was distraught and felt that she had been followed by a dark shadow above her
head.The encouter with Sam have left a icy grim on her face, though she felt
that all have fallen apart.She was frightened by his ugliness and treachery.As
we all have known that deceit’s omnipresence might be very intriguing , it
doesn’t mean anything to anyone if you are complaining yourself all the time, you must stay strong
and think clear.The same question which gives you headaches and a painful
desire to escape. Is not all that you’ve dreamt for, it’s just another world
whose principles are not like yours and people become strangers, stearing at
you as if you were a culprit, why do she have to care much of those invisible
eyes looking at her, but she wouldn’t be so mean to say all these.Poor soul,
she has never imagined that people like Sam can be mad and cruel to her.To
cruelty is never enough, the more it tortures your body the more you may get
insaine, and you’re saying that it’s unfair.She declined Sam’s proposals of
anykind, saying that she came to his house to work.Most of the young women
would accept the compromise to have an affair to this terrible individual, she won’t.Never
accept compromises to none,
you may feel miserable because of it.Compromises would make you weak and
you may behave like a coward, too.She have thought of it and she promised it
won’t be so.She was afraid of him, lurking like a fiend for the next victim.Why
do I have to be polite to him, she thought, and kind too, you must be out of your
witts.Yes, you have to be polite even to those who may hate you from the buttom
of their guts.
She reminded of those old scenarios about young
maids strangled by their masters and lost onto the mists of time.How horrible
might be?!You must learn to play master and servant even if you like it or
not.D. went into the kitchen to finish her households, and she had a hot cup of
tea with milk.She have heard footsteps and moans on the stairs.Who might be?!She
never cared of what was going on around her, though she has gone to her bedroom
trying to fall asleep.Suddenly, the silence was broken by the sound of the door
as if someone pushed to enter into the bedroom.A cold mist approached to her
little bed,she felt like a doll trapped
into her box. What if the presence may destroy her paintings near her bed?!D.
heard a growl whispered into her ear then a cold voice shouting ‘’poison,
poison, poison, my child, muder, run, run, run , muder….’’.You cannot think of
anything when you feel that something is moving around you but you cannot see
cleary in pitch dark. You may get petrified by fear, though you feel your heart
beating faster and faster, like pumping out of your chest.She felt suffocated
and dreadfull.She thought she will be lost forever, disappear for good from the
world, into an unknown place, a horrifying beadroom from a manor house whose
name shall never be known.The wardrobe’s doors were opened violently by an
invisible force followed by strange noises and whisles.A cloaked shape was
rising from the dark and the smell of poison into her nostrils.The rageous
invisible force became stronger, she wished to scream but she cannot move her
mandibula.It’s like a feeling that someone is mocking you with no reason.She
felt badly, she thought she was becoming mad, her skeptycism vanished for good.
On the next morning she woke up early, went into the
kitchen and saw through the window two nuns walking in the courtyard, then
vanishing like it were never been there.She came upstairs to dust the stairways
and heard loud footsteps.She felt that
the stairs became warm, but it was nobody there.She felt pushed away from the
stairs and heard chattings into the living room.She ran to the living and heard
voices and laughings, again she felt trapped because it was nobody there.She was
certain that manor is haunted.She came outside and asked a neighbour about what
happened to her and she said that the old maid have left the house screaming
and full of fear in the middle of the night.
West rejects the East by all means, she knew from the
start.Soon after this creepy experience she left the manor and went to the
railway station to buy a ticket for no return.At Wakefield West Gate all is
into deep silence, like ghosts are wandering into the living world.She became a
ghost like those in Sam’s manor.That was the ultimate encounter with fear.She
defeated her fear, though she felt better.You don’t know where she will go, if
she go to some safe place.She wished to flock on the streets of Wakefield until
early in the morning.
What could you buy with few pounds?She wished to
conquer the world, but she
defeated her fears instead of all.
Welcome to England!
The Gates of Proudness were broken for good.Now, she
felt no barriers, no Eastern traces, just silence to cover up the secrets.
