‘’………..consuming precious energy to explore the unkown up to unreliable dreams’’ (scraps from diary pages, 2010, Wakefield, Yorkshire, GB)
The butcher will strike again, she was mad of this obsession roaming into her head, like an old chorus that we all knew from the start.It difers from one individual to another, speed some fear and your heart may pump from your chest, already.This endless battle within yourself shall never find an escape, like a foolish game about losers and winners, an open debate too.It feels like an unruly anger possess your spirit, though all you have to do is move on.
Is it true, isn’t it?!As if people would know something about truth, it’s too much hypocrisy in the world, though truth shall never be found.Definetly, it’s true.D. was distraught and felt that she had been followed by a dark shadow above her head.The encouter with Sam have left a icy grim on her face, though she felt that all have fallen apart.She was frightened by his ugliness and treachery.As we all have known that deceit’s omnipresence might be very intriguing , it doesn’t mean anything to anyone if you are complaining yourself all the time, you must stay strong and think clear.The same question which gives you headaches and a painful desire to escape. Is not all that you’ve dreamt for, it’s just another world whose principles are not like yours and people become strangers, stearing at you as if you were a culprit, why do she have to care much of those invisible eyes looking at her, but she wouldn’t be so mean to say all these.Poor soul, she has never imagined that people like Sam can be mad and cruel to her.To cruelty is never enough, the more it tortures your body the more you may get insaine, and you’re saying that it’s unfair.She declined Sam’s proposals of anykind, saying that she came to his house to work.Most of the young women would accept the compromise to have an affair to this terrible individual, she won’t.Never accept compromises to none, you may feel miserable because of it.Compromises would make you weak and you may behave like a coward, too.She have thought of it and she promised it won’t be so.She was afraid of him, lurking like a fiend for the next victim.Why do I have to be polite to him, she thought, and kind too, you must be out of your witts.Yes, you have to be polite even to those who may hate you from the buttom of their guts.
She reminded of those old scenarios about young maids strangled by their masters and lost onto the mists of time.How horrible might be?!You must learn to play master and servant even if you like it or not.D. went into the kitchen to finish her households, and she had a hot cup of tea with milk.She have heard footsteps and moans on the stairs.Who might be?!She never cared of what was going on around her, though she has gone to her bedroom trying to fall asleep.Suddenly, the silence was broken by the sound of the door as if someone pushed to enter into the bedroom.A cold mist approached to her little bed,she felt like a doll trapped into her box. What if the presence may destroy her paintings near her bed?!D. heard a growl whispered into her ear then a cold voice shouting ‘’poison, poison, poison, my child, muder, run, run, run , muder….’’.You cannot think of anything when you feel that something is moving around you but you cannot see cleary in pitch dark. You may get petrified by fear, though you feel your heart beating faster and faster, like pumping out of your chest.She felt suffocated and dreadfull.She thought she will be lost forever, disappear for good from the world, into an unknown place, a horrifying beadroom from a manor house whose name shall never be known.The wardrobe’s doors were opened violently by an invisible force followed by strange noises and whisles.A cloaked shape was rising from the dark and the smell of poison into her nostrils.The rageous invisible force became stronger, she wished to scream but she cannot move her mandibula.It’s like a feeling that someone is mocking you with no reason.She felt badly, she thought she was becoming mad, her skeptycism vanished for good.
On the next morning she woke up early, went into the kitchen and saw through the window two nuns walking in the courtyard, then vanishing like it were never been there.She came upstairs to dust the stairways and heard loud footsteps.She felt that the stairs became warm, but it was nobody there.She felt pushed away from the stairs and heard chattings into the living room.She ran to the living and heard voices and laughings, again she felt trapped because it was nobody there.She was certain that manor is haunted.She came outside and asked a neighbour about what happened to her and she said that the old maid have left the house screaming and full of fear in the middle of the night.
West rejects the East by all means, she knew from the start.Soon after this creepy experience she left the manor and went to the railway station to buy a ticket for no return.At Wakefield West Gate all is into deep silence, like ghosts are wandering into the living world.She became a ghost like those in Sam’s manor.That was the ultimate encounter with fear.She defeated her fear, though she felt better.You don’t know where she will go, if she go to some safe place.She wished to flock on the streets of Wakefield until early in the morning.
What could you buy with few pounds?She wished to conquer the world, but she
defeated her fears instead of all.
Welcome to England!
The Gates of Proudness were broken for good.Now, she felt no barriers, no Eastern traces, just silence to cover up the secrets.